人生

这几年,每天都过着懵懵懂懂的生活
时间一分一秒地流逝
年龄也一天一天的增长
童年岁月一切都成了回忆
小学,中学的朋友一个个都各奔东西
现在想到以后一个人到别州,到生疏的地方念书,工作
过着无依无靠,孤独的生活
想到没有家人,没有朋友的陪伴就很难过
突然有一个念头
就是放弃学业留在家乡陪伴家人
我是不是应该酱做呢???我也不知道。。

活了这二十年
生活算是充满精彩的
有喜,有怒,有哀,有乐
被打过,被骂过,被伤害过,被讨厌过,被整过
虽然心灵多多少少也有了创伤
但还是必须面对一切

人生的舞台就是一个大道場
每个人终其一生都在接受各式各样的考验
有时候是有人出题目考你
有时候是整个环境考你
有时候则是自己考自己
至于能不能通过每一场考验
就得靠自己平常的努力,毅力和定力

Searching the way of changing mindset

How can i stop thinking of doing stupid things

Any solution can suggest me??

Don't know why the things will suddenly pop up in my mind

Don't know why feel wanna do some thing even i was driving that time

Don't know why feel wanna to do so

I can't even control myself everyday and every night

What the hell

Sometime i don't think that is a stupid thing and it's the only way i can do for myself

Sometime when i want to do it,there's someone beside or behind has awake me and i din't do so

I can said that every night is a nightmare for me

But what can i do somemore beside doing that??

What is the other way for me?

Everytime when wanna share to someone there's a block or wall that stop me to shared it

No one is beside me,no one can i share with this problem..

Everyday live in this situation,what's the meaning of life to me

Who can help me??

Who can tell me how to stop thinking of doing some thing??

How can i change my mindset??

What's the way??

I just want a life that full of happiness

Meaningless

Just saw this phrase -- " Having a rough day? Place your hand over your heart. Feel that? That's called purpose. You're alive for a reason. Don't give up! "
After read this, i was asking myself  "is that true?" Can't give up?
But what my heart tell me is it is just a lie,we can't trust it!!!
The truth is rarely pure and never simple..
I don't know why,why every things will become worst and worst day by day
The oddest things hurt me.They get stuck in my head and replay over and over
I wanna scream but can't...
I wanna sing k to release my tension but can't..
What else can i do??
It's so suck
Someone had told me that you can't control how some people will treat you or what they'll say about you,but you can control how you react to it.
It's simple to said but  I CAN'T!!
I can't do it,i can't control it!!!!
Some things can't be explained and some things don't even deserve to be said.
It's MEANINGLESS LIFE
So what to do now?? End my life or waiting to die??

Feelings

日子一天一天地过，可脑袋还是想着那个画面
你知不知道你所说的话像一把刀直插入了我的心，
当时，我的心是很痛很痛，眼泪一直在眼里打滚着，不管怎样我都一直忍着不让泪水流下来，可是最后我还是想你投降，让它流下来。
我相信我一定会记得你说的话
我不懂！！我不懂为什么会发生在我身上
我到底做错还是说错了什么？？
难道我说的话真的无法得到大家的信任吗？？
为什么每次我说的话你们都不信？
老天爷啊！！为什么全部事情都要在同一个时间发生，而且偏偏发生在我身上
难道之前我的压力还不够大？
接下来的日子又会发生什么事？
我真的真的无法控制情绪
无法勇敢的面对未来
I can't control my feelings, but i hate how my feelings can control me!!

Give Up

Before, i was so free and never thinking on my study

But now....now.....

Now i was quite scaring and headache with this thing-STUDY

I just searching for the courses i want and their qualification

But what i found is all courses i want are not qualified for me

What the hell is going on now???

Why i can't study what i want???
GOSH!!!!!!!

My future is GONE....

Fly far away from me already,how to catch it up???

WHY?????

Why GOD you don't want to help me??? Not only din't help me but also the passenger in MH370..

Ok...don't said about MH370 now...

I was so wondering...why all this happened on me??

Sometimes,I was wonder why all my friends are so success in their study,why i can't???

I think I had try very hard and try my best,but i'm still failed...

What's the matter now??? 

I hate MYSELF!!!!

I hate STUDY!!!!

I hate GOVERNMENT!!!!

I hate EVERYTHING!!!!

Are FAILURE is always the FAILURE?

I was thinking to give up but how am i going tell my parents

I'm not dare..

Even if i din't tell them i know what they will saying on me(just blah blah blah)....

But what to do??
Decide to GIVE UP?